First of all Weddit thanks for all the input and help and ideas. It was great to have a place of sanity to go while we were planning this day for the last 2.5 years! Our wedding was incredible and while it wasn't the day we had originally wanted, it was perfect. I am so grateful that we were able to have our closest friends and closest family there. As we navigated our options with postponing we realized that it wasn't really an option for us. Due to my husband's job if we didn't have our celebration in October, it wasn't going to happen until at least fall 2022. We'd already been engaged for 2 years and we were both ready to move on. While postponing is the right option for some couples, we realized that there are a million reasons to celebrate so we wanted to do something this year and we can throw a huge party with everyone we love for an anniversary, birthday, big life celebration, or just because we want to.
I know that having a wedding at all right now is a controversial topic. I really don't want to have the conversation with anyone about the precautions we took. Among other things, every single person that attended had to have a negative test within 24 hrs. We did not invite friends/family that would have to travel and the one bridesmaid (bff) that did travel came in with us 3 weeks early so that we could all quarantine and test multiple times. We also had ample mask wearing, sanitizer, distancing of all seating, and everything was outside. Post wedding everyone tested again and everyone was negative. I do not want to engage with anyone on if it was the right thing to do.
THE BASICS
Date: October 10, 2020
Guests: originally planning for 225, ended up with about 50 once we cut the list down. There were a lot of family and friends that weren't invited to our smaller celebration.
Venue: The Historic Thayer Hotel at West Point
Pictures: https://imgur.com/a/DpcLVeX
What went not so right:

• I super sprained my ankle on the way to the venue on Friday. We were picking up lunch in the town next to the hotel and I stepped of a curb wrong. I ended up with 2 grade 3 (the worst!) ankle sprains on the inside and outside of my ankle, with significant bone bruising. This was determined at my MRI the Tuesday after the wedding. Thanks to the hotel for having a wheelchair for the rehearsal, my physical therapist for being the best and facetiming me literally hours before the rehearsal, my aunt for getting multiple boots for me on her way up, and the most amazing friends I was able to walk down the aisle and overall have an amazing night.
• The flowers. They were all kinds of wrong. No one else would know that but me, but instead of a bouquet with lots of flowers the greenery to flower ratio was completely wrong. The colors were wrong (way more white than burgundy) and overall the flowers were just not what I wanted. When we went for the final she didn't have a mock up done and if I were to do this again I would insist there was a mockup so that I'd know I was getting what I wanted. There were also no cake flowers provided. I would not recommend this florist (PM me if you need details)
• the cake. While it tasted fine and none of our guests knew it was also all kinds of wrong. 4 days before the wedding the owner of the bakery called me and tried to completely change our cake. We were meant to have a full buttercream cake with the bottom tier burgundy ombre and flowers on the cake. This was what we got instead There was fondant and it looked like an episode of "nailed it". Our Maitre'd also said that the overall quality of the cake was terrible (this was their preferred vendor and apparently quality has been declining) and I honestly felt like we were scammed between the tasting and presentation and what we ended up with. I would never recommend anyone get a cake from Sweet Grace bakery in NJ.
• Some key family members weren't able to be there. My husband's aunt and uncle, who was supposed to be our second officiant, couldn't be there due to a medical issue (unrelated to COVID) and he was very much missed. A dear friend was also unable to come be a bridesmaid in the wedding due to the pandemic. She moved abroad and was going to come back to the states, see family and quarantine, but given current restrictions, she was nervous about being able to get back to her home so she wasn't able to be there.

What went right:

• literally everything else.
• I walked down the aisle to "Storybook Love" from the princess bride. The ceremony made me cry. My husband's vows were the most romantic and I felt like our ceremony was a perfect blend of us. We are an interfaith couple and we wrote our ceremony with the help of our officiant, my aunt. We used both a reading from the bible and followed many cultural jewish traditions. More than one person told me that they loved how we did a modern secular reading of the seven blessings and we had descriptions of all of the rituals and traditions in our program. If anyone wants a link to the rituals and traditions in a jew-ish wedding i'm happy to pass along.
• Streaming was amazing. We hired someone my mom found (PM for info, he was seriously great) to set up streaming for our ceremony. The stream was high quality, our website worked well, putting the program online and making a virtual guestbook were great touches. It was streamed through youtube live and it was so nice that it auto records so that we could see it right away! I'd recommend kudoboard for anyone that is doing a virtual ceremony. We loved reading all of the notes and I had the board printed to put with our untraditional guestbook
• the food! Omg the food. We had a cocktail hour with individually plated apps, a 5 course dinner, dessert, and a farewell station. Our venue also wrapped up all of the food my husband and I couldn't eat and it was just delicious. Food, photo, and overall vibe were the top things for us and we definitely achieved it.
• photo and video-- i'm obsessed with our photographer, PM me for the details because I didn't ask about posting. Our videographer was also amazing and he actually stuck around for like 20 min after his scheduled end time so he could see us attempt to cut the cake with a sword. I would highly recommend both
• My veil and makeup! My veil was made by the incredible Morgan from Cicada bridal in Seattle and Makeup was perfect. Our makeup artist (PM for details) did a great job of keeping us on a schedule and overall made the morning vibe perfect. She stood up for me when I needed it the day of the wedding as well. Those two things really made me feel like my look came together and my bridesmaids all loved their looks.
• Mismatched bridesmaid dressed. Honestly I'm just obsessed with the burgundy to blush look and i'd do this again in a heartbeat. I am so glad that everyone picked their own dresses. I gave all bridesmaids $100 to get a dress.
• the band! everyone had a great time and they did a really good job reading the room on when it was time to eat vs when some people wanted to dance. They never called everyone to the dance floor and we had an amazing night. Even my aunt who had been beyond a hermit for the last 8 months felt safe during some of the slow songs to dance with my uncle, away from everyone.

BUDGET BREAKDOWN
I am doing my best to break down the budget as detailed as possible. We got married in a HCOL area and our original budget reflects the plan for a more traditional Jewish wedding, where parents were allowed to invite friends. It was important to us that everyone was there with us, our whole proverbial community and we knew there would be a premium paid for that. Once we downsized and added streaming I know there were ways to do it for less, but the quality of the virtual experience was important to us. I don't regret for one second what we spent on things, and we could've easily spent more.
I am putting this budget breakdown in because the two in my budget range that I saw when I was planning made me feel more sane. I really do not appreciate the budget shaming that often happens on this sub. It was hard planning in such a HCOL area where the national averages are not representative, so I do hope this can help anyone who is looking for what things really cost for a wedding of this size in and around NYC
One thing to note is that we got engaged in June 2018 and while we spent a lot of money, a lot of it was spread out over nearly 2.5 years. Day to day, the amount spent on the wedding didn't impact our budget and we did not go into any debt.
My parents contributed a set amount to the wedding and my fiancé's parents covered the rehearsal dinner. I am not including my engagement ring or the honeymoon in this because I have a rough idea of how much my husband spent on my ring, but I've never asked for sure and our honeymoon is not going to happen until the world opens up. We are planning on taking 2 big trips to double celebrate our honeymoon (and because since we're waiting, why not?) to Japan and then to South Africa and Namibia.
totals:
all totals include gratuities
initial budget: 80k
planned budget pre-covid: 100k
Total spent (including things that were not really in the budget) ~50k
Breakdown:
****Ceremony and Reception: ****

• Venue and Catering: $14,005.18 This included the fee for the ceremony ($1500), AV setup (hardwired internet), breakfast/lunch the day of, all wedding food, open bar, matire'd fee, gratuities/taxes, all linens, china, table setup, staff, cake, etc. this also includes the cost for the bride and groom's hotel room for 1 night as it was comped the other night.
• Officiants: $600, we had my aunt officiate and did the legal bits in a count house months earlier so she did this for free but we paid for her hotel room (2 nights) as a thank you so
• Ceremony Streaming: $750. This was a last minute cost and while we both think it was a bit high, the streaming was perfect and paying to not have that stress was incredible. I'd highly recommend the guy who did our streaming as he set everything up well and we got so many compliments on the stream.
• Ceremony/Cocktail Hour Music: $700 this included a flute/violin duet for a prelude and ceremony and then a jazz trio for cocktail hour. They were great.
• Flowers: $3,906.76 . We are in discussions with the florist that we did not get the things we asked for and are looking for a refund in some part of this. Our original estimate pre covid was aver $5,000 for flowers to give some context. we had 7 bridesmaids bouquets, 1 brides bouquet, 7 table centerpieces, chuppah rental and florals, and placecard table flowers.
• Cocktail Hour Decor: ~50. I am so glad I did this myself since our flowers generally sucked and they wanted to charge me $35 per bud vase. I thrifted bud vases and bought some from a bride on reddit, then I got 2 old atlases from half price books, some floral wire, and then tiny black rocks from amazon. Overall this DIY cost me like $50 and it was perfect. Also in this cost are some cool votive candles I bought from amazon.
• Photography: $6,000. incredible would 100% recommend. PM me for the name. This included 10 hrs of shooting, over 800 photos, and an album
• Videography: $2,000 incredible would 100% recommend. PM me for the name. This included a full day of shooting, all raw footage, a ~5 min highlight video and a full ceremony video.
• Sabers for Saber Arch: $100 donation to the West Point Hostess Office
• Photo Booth: $350 total. $250 deposit lost due to covid. Once we moved everything outside we didn't have a good place for the photo booth or to run electricity to it. So we cancelled that and instead spent $100 on a big cutout frame we hung from the ceiling. Originally the photobooth was going to be another $400 so I'm just counting it was coming out ahead.
• Tents and dance floor rental: ~$3,500 this was an additional cost that we took on as a covid precaution and it was perfect. This includes rentals (2 tents with walls that we ended up keeping up), having tent heaters on standby (they weren't needed), and the dance floor. My mom did a great job working with the venue and the rental organization to get a great setup and flow with the tents.
• Party Entertainment: $8,500 this includes 10 musicians and live continuous music for the entire party. Also includes their travel fee and they MC'd our entire reception. They were wonderful!

​
****Appearances ****

• Gown/Alterations: $1400 for the gown, $895 for alterations - I felt incredible and I hope some of the photos I posted help any bride who is size conscious to know that even at my heaviest I felt amazing and your size shouldn't stop you from having an amazing time.
• Bridal Hair and Makeup: Hair $300, Makeup $325, bridesmaids/moms - hair $100-$150 depending on style, $125 for makeup. Both services were optional for bridesmaids and my mom decided the week of the wedding to help subsidize the cost for all bridesmaids who elected to have the services.
• Bridal Accessories: $610 Veil ($500), party earrings ($45), ceremony earrings ($0), and party headpiece ($65). All other jewelry (hat, diamond necklace, diamond bracelet, other rings) were all family pieces
• Bridesmaids Dresses: $600 - $100 per bridesmaid. Note: this wasn't necessary for groomsmen because they were all in uniforms, except my brother and my dad covered his tux
• Groom's outfit: ~80, $70 for a special uniform belt for his saber an then $10 on socks with our cat's face on them
• Wedding Rings: $1850 for both rings, his was from Costco, mine was made from diamonds I got at an estate sale by a local. jeweler. I am obsessed with my ring. there was an additional cost to polish/dip our rings and watches and jewelry but I'm not counting it in this budget because it's regular maintenance.

​
****Gifts and things people kept****

• Stationary: ~ 350 + invitations this includes: save the dates ($175), invites, thank you notes, & invitations to our virtual celebration (honestly I don't know my mom just paid directly to the invitation lady), ceremony programs ($70), menus ($30), place cards ($30),
• Wedding Party Gifts: ~$550 for 6 bridesmaids, 5 groomsmen and 2 jr groomsmen. bridesmaids got a zip up for getting ready, a makeup case and a faux fur shawl in case they were cold. Groomsmen got a yeti bottle opener and a six pack of their favorite beer. Not including the gifts we gave when we asked them to be in the wedding
• Welcome gifts and Bathroom Basket: ~$300, 25 bags we included 2 new mexico soaps, costco snacks and drinks in a canvas bag. the bathroom basket stuff was all free and leftover things we used from my cousin's bat mitzvah
• Favors: $241.51 we had the cutest little globes we filled with gummy bears! The shipping on the gummy bears was dumb but weddings make you do dumb things.
• Flip Flops : $30 for 30 pairs of flip flops. My mom bought the baskets from Marshalls, not sure how much they were but assuming under $20 each. We ended up selling the ones we didn't use.

​
****Misc****

• Wedding insurance: $636.00 this includes the liability insurance required by our venue and full cancellation insurance in case my husband was unexpectedly deployed. We didn't want to take any chances with this and losing deposits/full amounts, even though in the contracts we ensured there were military clauses throughout. This was purchased in 2019 and gave us incredible piece of mind as we opted for full full coverage.
• Misc Decor and things: $500 This includes: photo frames (we did pics of us in the tub as kids on the bathroom doors) and a photo table, placecard holders, ribbons so we could do a socially distanced hora, a Mr. and Mrs sign for our table, alcohol for our suite afterparty, chargers for the tables, kudoboard (unlimited), website domain

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****Not counted in this budget ****
Dance Lessons: ~$600 This money would've been super well spent if I hadn't hurt myself. we still did dance a bit but it wasn't what we planned. One day we can use those skills. I actually had a great time at the dance lessons and I'd 100% do it again.
Pre Marital Counseling: ~$500 very much money well spent. We did 4 sessions with a counselor online in the weeks before the wedding. We both felt like we got some great tools and it was a fantastic outlet for conversations we needed to have. I liked that it was virtual which made it accessible and I feel like we could go back to that counselor if we ever needed it.
Ketubah: ~400, this was a Hanukkah gift in 2019
Smashing Glasses: ~200 this was a gift from my aunt who officiated the wedding.
Engagement Ring
Honeymoon
Post-Wedding Brunch - My parents paid for this, it was casual
Wedding Shoes: ~$400, I bought these incredible something bleu shoes Navy kitten heels and then glitter keds for the party. I ended up in a boot and a sneaker so womp. But luckily both pairs of these shoes aren't very "bridal" and i'm definitely planning on wearing the glitter keds to the next tech conference I go to. I don't consider these "wedding budget" things because I'll wear them other times as well.
Rehearsal dinner - MIL paid for this
I'm glad I can post this and happy to talk to any other brides/grooms who are in the midst of planning!

1. This lace-design bunting will add a touch of elegance to any open space.
2. You can put these flameless tea lights anywhere you want to add a warm glow – and you won't have to worry about that drunk uncle setting the table on fire.
3. These light-up initials are surprisingly cheap and make a cute lil' addition to your wedding decor.
4. Let's be honest, a wedding is all about the flowers! If you're trying to save cash where you can then artificial ones are a good compromise – these faux hanging wisteria vines look truly ethereal.
5. You can stick these little gold-tone butterflies on any boring flat surface to make it flutterly fabulous!
6. This DIY wax seal stamp kit will let you add a luxe-looking personal touch to your invitations!
7. These fairy lights look like teeny tiny lightbulbs – you can hang them overhead or drape them around your table decorations.
8. And these fairy lights are designed to look like cherry blossom flowers, making them look that little bit extra special!
9. This natural petal confetti is biodegradable and comes in 31 different – but equally gorgeous – colours!
10. You can put these cork string lights inside any glass bottles you have lying around for an easy and personal touch to your table decorations.
11. You can put sweets, spirits, personal notes, or anything else tiny enough inside these little bottles that make perfect party favours.
12. This rose gold sequin tablecloth will add just the right amount of pizzazz to your main table.
13. These faux cherry blossom garlands will look gorgeous draped over a banister or around the table decorations.
14. And you can get super creative with this faux eucalyptus garland that will go with pretty much everything!
15. Planning a wedding is complicated enough, let alone making it social distancing-friendly! Thankfully you can jot down all your important plans in this wedding planner journal.
16. These personalised compact mirrors make perfect little wedding favours or gifts for your bridesmaids!
17. These elegant hair slides look way more expensive than they actually are!
18. This faux flower crown is simply perfect for a summer garden wedding.
19. And these handmade flower crowns have a more subtle matching design that's perfect for bridesmaids or flower girls!
20. Hang or drape these artificial ivy garlands over any empty-looking spaces to give them an easy makeover.
21. These balloon stands will give your decorations some height and a professional-looking finish!
22. This floral backdrop will make your guests' pictures look amazing, and as it's 2D it takes up very little space!
23. And finally, these curtain lights will make any boring space look magical!

Link to article

I'm stressing out over wedding planning right now and I need someone to bring me back to my senses.
Being in lockdown is making everything difficult. Not as difficult as those who have had to cancel, but I feel like I'm going around in circles nonetheless. We're still hopeful that our Halloween wedding is still going to go ahead, but there's massive roadblocks in the way that I don't know how to deal with.

1. Invitations

I'm currently writing them all up whilst FH is working from home. So far I've done all of my day guests and 3 of FH's, but the family members I've been in touch with aren't replying and his mam isn't handing over any addresses either. I'd really like to get them posted by the end of the week.

1. FH's suit

He wants a purple one, so he can be The Joker for the reception, but definitely doesn't want a dress up costume. I can only find them on Amazon. He wants to be able to try it on before he buys it. I point out the returns policy and tell him he needs to order it (and probably get a size bigger so we can get it fitted). He still wants to try it on. No UK stores sell anything like it and we are in lockdown. Who knows how long it will be until we can go and try stuff on. Circle round and round and round.

1. Wedding party suits

3a. FH's family are a lot more well off than mine. I was planning on getting suits that cost £80 max for his dad, my dad, the best man, my sister (who wants to wear a suit) and two kids versions for his little brothers. FH and his dad are insisting that FH's dad and the kids suits will be from a high end retailer and probably cost £200 for the kids and £300+ for his dad. I'm concerned that they won't match my dad, sister and the best man, to all of whom £80 is a stretch; FH's suit is coming to £100 max on Amazon and also, who buys kids suits that they'll wear once and never fit into again?
3b. FH doesnt think my sister should wear the same suit as the rest of the wedding party "because she'll look like she's on the mens side" and she'll "want to be seen as one of the guys" (my sister is going through some gender identity stuff and has boy days and girl days. As such, I asked her to be my "Bob of Honour" because my nickname for her has always been Bob and asked her what she wanted to wear because she was SUPER uncomfortable in the dress she had to wear at my siblings wedding).
It won't look like my dad, the best man or my sister are part of the wedding party if they're wearing different suits to FH's dad and brothers anyway.

1. My dress

Other than invitations, this is my biggest concern.
I was going to be having a dress made for me because I hate plain white dresses. I'd arranged an appointment for the week after lockdown started. Now that's gone to pot and the company isn't able to run for the time being (no fault of their own, obviously), so I'm stressed that, until lockdown ends, the time it will take to design and make my dress will become shorter and shorter, potentially even to the point where it isn't possible anymore. I also can't find anything similar online.
If anyone knows anywhere that I can order a grey dress with white lace overlay or somewhere that can do a white structured top/corset with lace sleeves (so I could just buy the grey skirt I've seen) then give me a heads up.
Other than those 4 things, everything else is small details. Decor, table and chair covers, getting around to ordering my bouquet and FH's boutonniere, persuading my mum that the spotify playlist I've made will have to do because finding a DJ isn't working, my photographer getting back in touch with me, creating a Halloween X Wedding kids activity book etc.
Someone help me to plan my next steps and bring me back to Earth.

So I’ve been reading wedding recaps on here for the longest time. I’ve been lurking since before we were even engaged. The thing I love most about recaps is finding out about all the little quirks different cities, countries and cultures have in the weddings so I’m hoping you find my Scottish city wedding interesting!
Photos
Short video montage
Engagement length: 18 months
Location: Glasgow, Scotland, UK
General Date: Friday in June
Guest Count: 60 day guests / 55 evening guests (115 total during evening reception)
In the UK we have “day guests” who are usually close friends and family- they’re there for the ceremony, meal and evening reception. Then “evening guests” who come after the meal just for the party at night- for us these were co-workers and distant cousins.
Approx Budget: £11k
Us as a couple: Both 27. Been together ~ 8 years, lived together for 2 years. Professional jobs, home owners.
As far as I know weddings in Scotland tend to be cheaper than the rest of the UK- especially London.
We didn’t have a specific theme and we were both so relaxed about wedding planning. My Gran’s partner (who is heavy annoying) kept winding me up during planning like “Oh are you worried it’s not going to be perfect?” Honestly- no! We just accepted there was going to be some kind of drama or mass failure and rolled with it.
Budget Breakdown:
Venue: £1,000
We got married in Glasgow’s oldest bar- opened in 1797. It’s right in the city centre which was convenient for us. It meant we didn’t have to organise transport for all our guests as there are so many easy public transport links. We absolutely loved this venue. Most wedding venues we looked at were hotels and while they’re SO beautiful to look at on the outside (usually converted castles, old estate houses etc) the thought of having our wedding ceremony in what was essentially a hotel conference room felt really flat- especially as we both go to lots of conferences for work. The pub we got married in has a ballroom on the top floor which is used for Ceilidhs and of course the whole place just had that pub smell of beer soaked into wood which I LOVE,
Takeaway: So we did the risky thing and booked this venue without signing a contract or anything. Our wedding co-ordinator at the venue was really hands off and laid back and we only met in person once- everything else was over email. She was so nice and nothing was too much trouble but I think we were a particularly low maintenance couple. I’ve been to this pub many times and (even though the TripAdvisor reviews are overwhelmingly average) I love the food, atmosphere and selection of gins so I wasn’t too interested in reading other people’s reviews.
DJ: £685 for 6 hours
We found our DJ on Facebook and booked him online. He was so knowledgeable about our venue and the layout and sent a really nice, long introductory email explaining his prices, experiences and how he envisioned our day. We had a skype meeting a few weeks before the wedding where we discussed our music- must-plays and no-plays. Because of venue is famous for hosting traditional Scottish Ceilidh’s, we also decided to have one at the start of the evening reception but it didn’t go ahead (will explain further down).At the end of the night the traditional last song at a Scottish wedding is called “Loch Lomond”. Everyone stands in a circle and the bride and groom dance in the middle then everyone runs in towards the couple and back out again during the chorus. I have been to so many weddings that I didn’t even realise this was a mad Scottish thing until our English and Polish friends who had travelled here for the wedding were like WTF?! The ballroom is built on beams so the floor was literally bouncing up and down. It was incredible. Our DJ posted on his Facebook page the next day that it felt like a gig instead of a wedding which mace us so happy - for us it just showed how much fun everyone was having dancing the night away.
Takeaway: This DJ could read the room so well. He was so funny and didn’t MC too much. He made sure to walk round the tables and ask people for requests and make sure they were enjoying the music which was so nice of him. He totally got the party vibe of our wedding and the music went exactly how we wanted.
Catering: £3000
So again, weddings in Scotland/ the UK are particularly long (usually between 10-12 hours) so people tend to get fed twice. Usually a sit-down main meal (called the wedding breakfast) is served for the day guests (ours was served at 5pm) then an evening buffet for the evening guests and day guests who are hungry from all the dancing (ours was served at 9pm)
Our wedding breakfast menu for our 60 evening guest was:
Starter: Goats cheese salad, antipasti platter or haggis pakora
Main: Venison lasagna, Rainbow trout and chorizo or beer battered halloumi.
Dessert: Lemon cheesecake, chocolate fudge cake or cheeseboard
Open bars really aren’t the norm in Scotland because we have such a heavy drinking culture. But we got everyone a welcome glass of prosecco, ½ bottle of wine with their meal and another glass of prosecco for the speeches.
Our evening buffet was breakfast rolls with bacon, sausage and egg (again this sounds really weird but it’s not uncommon here), mac and cheese, salad and french fries.
For drinks we planned on having a cash bar BUT my mum and dad ended up putting a tab behind the bar which we didn’t expect. It was so kind of them and our guests were so surprised.
Takeaway: We only heard good things from our guests. The food was really the highlight of my day because I was starving!! It was so important to me that we had good food. And the gin selection at our venue was amazing- I was so happy with my parma violet flavoured gin all night!
Photographer: £5958 hours, single shooter, photo download only- no album. I cared a lot about photos so we did so much research on finding the perfect photographer. Ours was very inexpensive compared to photographers in our area (usually about £1500 is average here) but he hadn’t been working as a full time photographer for long. He had a great folio and we wanted a documentary/fine-art style with very few staged pictures and he ticked all the boxes.
Takeaway: Our photographer totally captured the day as it happened. We obviously checked the boxes and got those stages/posed shots with our mums and dads etc. but I am so thoroughly in love with our photos.
**Videographer: £1300.**1 shooter for 8 hours- 4 minute edited video montage and a 1.5hour feature length film. This was documentary.fine art style too and we absolutely adored our videographer. It was such a pleasure to have him shoot the day. He had such good banter with my husband who was especially nervous and made him feel so at ease.
Invitations, stamps, etc: £197We didn’t do Save The Dates or RSVP’s. We sent our guest a single sided A5 postcard style invite with the address of our wedding website on the front. It worked out great! And for the postage Royal Mail were doing limited edition Marvel stamps which were sure a cute touch :) Our invites and thank you cards were both done on printed.com using a design I made on Canva. Also highly recommend using a wedding website. We used gettingmarried.co.uk and the only person who had trouble using it was one of my MILs friends- even my gran found it easy!
Flowers: £415
I’m so lucky that one of my co-workers is training to become a wedding florist. She’s done a few weddings in the past for friends and family and I loved her big, natural, leafy style and so became her first paying client! We don’t know much about flowers so we were happy to let her do her own thing. She made 1 bridal bouquet, 4 bridesmaids bouquets, 4 flower crowns, 10 buttonholes and 3 centrepieces (we had 7 tables and used the bridesmaids bouquets for the other centrepieces).
Venue decor: £510
I LOOOOOVED OUR VENUE DECOR. This included chair covers, candles, aisle runner and best of all- a fairy light canopy over the danceflooceremony area. It was just magical- like something from a fairy tale.
Takeaway: This is something I really wanted even though it was quite a big expense. I’m so glad we did it. People always talk about “oh you’ll never remember what the table covers or XYZ looked like on your wedding day” but I’ll remember the way I felt when I walked into the room and saw that magical fairy light canopy and rose petal scattered aisle for the rest of my life. The venue dresser was SO lovely too. MY husband and I were the last people to leave the venue at 2am and by that time she had turned up to take down all the decor. She was so excited to meet us because she says she never gets to see couples on their wedding day! (We’re just party animals haha)
Other Decor: £150
I’m actually struggling to put a figure on this because it was just wee bits and bobs here and there that I didn’t add to our spreadsheet. An easel and a display board for our seating chart, vases for our centrepieces, printed polaroids of us scattered around.
Wedding Insurance £60.
Wedding Dress: £850
This was the most American thing about my wedding- a gown from David’s Bridal! There are only 4 David’s Bridal’s in the UK and I just happen to live really close to one. I loved the first gown I tried on and bought it then and there. It was such a big shop and the colour just really popped out in the sea of white. I bought it when I was 135lbs and was about 150lbs at the wedding so I was PACKED into that shit.
Wedding Shoes: £210 (£70 + £70 + £70)
My shoes were from Irregular Choice. I got them for £70 off of Amazon and my beagle ate the first pair (((((: See my post history for guilty boi pics- I ordered a second pair. Then I wanted a pair of trainers to wear at night so I bought a beauuuuuutiful pair of pastel blue Nike Air Force 1s.
4 x Bridesmaids Dresses: £240
So the thing we got the most compliments on were our bridesmaid’s ASOS dresses! (What am I? Chopped liver?!) They were SO stunning and suited them so perfectly even though each of them were different shapes and sizes. My bridesmaids were happy and comfortable which was really important to me. We paid for the dresses as is traditional here. If you’re thinking about buying your bridesmaids dresses on the highstreet or online- I say go for it!
5 x Groomsmen Kilts: £650
The kilt hire for my husband and 4 groomsmen was pretty reasonable. They looked so handsome - my husband especially so of course- and it was my husband’s first time wearing one! We were both shocked by just how heavy it was! It’s not traditional to pay for the groomsmen’s kilts but we decided to pay because we thought it was fair as we were basically them asking to wear something specific and we were paying for the bridesmaids.
Tailor: £170
My neighbour is a seamstress (she actually works at David’s bridal lol) so she gave us a great friends and family rate to alter my dress AND my bridesmaids dresses for £170. My dress fitted perfectly around the bodice so it just needed taken up. Really sadly a few days before the wedding when I went to pick up my dress her husband told me she had been taken to hospital because of sepsis :( Her friend who is also a seamstress ended up doing the alterations while my neighbour gave her instructions over the phone FROM HER HOSPITAL BED. She REALLY went above and beyond and I’m so happy to report that she’s fully recovered now.
Hair: £90
This was just at my local hairdresser and included 2 trials. You'll see I hated both my previous trials from my post history so how it turned out on the day was a coin flip really. I just have one of those faces that doesn't seem to suit any hairstyle.
Officiant and marriage license: £225
Aww, our ceremony was just so beautiful. A friend from work has just become a wedding celebrant and she made it so personal for us. She sent us questionnaires to fill out separately which she turned into our vows. We had a traditional handfasting and we also did a Scottish quaich ceremony which is where both families share a drink whisky from a two handled pewter cup (we chose the House Greyjoy Talisker Select Reserve from the Game of Thrones collection which my mum and dad then polished off later lol)
I'm definitely forgetting a few things, but these were the major expenses!
​
THE GOOD
Weather - It rains here about 200 days of the year - including summer. Even getting married at the end of June doesn’t guarantee a nice day! We were so lucky because it was dry and sunny all day. It meant that we were able to get nice photos outside and that I wasn't dragging my dress around through puddles.
Atmosphere - Our vision for the day was just a pure good old fashioned knees-up. We wanted lots of dancing, lots of boozing and lots of tasty food. Everyone looked like they were having an absolute blast and I had the best day. It was just amazing having everyone we love all in one room- our friends, family all laughing and dancing together. Words can’t describe the absolute joy I felt.
Guestbook - This was such a huge hit and my husband’s best man has borrowed the idea for his wedding on Saturday! I bought a £1.99 guest book from Aldi (yass all about that special buys aisle), a glue stick an instax camera and some film- everyone took selfies, stuck them in the book and wrote messages. I get a bit weepy looking at the photos because they have such a nostalgic retro feel already and the wedding wasn't that long ago! I can imagine myself showing these to my wee ones in the future.
THE NOT SO GOOD
The heat- So as I said, we got married in a building that was built in the late 18th century in a country that is notoriously cold and rainy. Air con just does not exist here. It’s been ones of the hottest summers on record in the UK and by 8pm the place was an absolute sauna. I was sweating - I could literally feel the sweat running down my legs and OH MY GOD- I went to the toilet (myself thankfully) and when I lifted up my dress JESUS CHRIST THE SMELL. It smelled like the inside of a tent at a festival. Luckily I had made those wee pinterest bathroom baskets and was able to spray some deodorant up my dress hahahahaha. Still looked classy on the outside though… Some guests escaped for a bit to the beer garden for some fresh air and so did my husband and I.By 7pm the room was so hot that a ceilidh was out of the question. Ceilidh’s are so strenuous and can get you sweaty in the most air conditioned of rooms. Our guests didn’t seem to mind much!
The cake- We were drunk and forgot to eat our cake :( We spent AGES picking out the 4 flavours (carrot cake, malibu and coconut, malteaser and coffee) Everyone I spoke to said it was delicious- we really missed out. I’m gutted!
Overall, I’m glad to say the best party I’ve ever been to was my own wedding and I couldn’t have hoped to have a more fun or special day.
Thanks for reading <3

Yay we're married! Just over a month ago we had the best day of our lives! Weddit was my number one source of inspiration and support, and I can honestly say my day wouldn't have been what it was without you guys. I know this is going to be really long (it's turned into an actual novel), but I pride myself on my detail tracking and budgeting so if it helps one person, that's all that matters. I've included pictures along the way because my photographer is an angel and gave us all pictures back in one month, and links to vendors I was extremely happy with!
 
About us: Late twenties professionals, renters, 23 month engagement. We've been together 5 years, and were engaged just after the 3 year mark. We live together on our own in the GTA with one dog child.
Location: An Italian restaurant in Windsor, Ontario (my hometown - about 4 hours from our home in the GTA). This venue had an event room above the main restaurant with a kitchen, bar & full bathrooms. We were able to do everything upstairs and all in one place - both the ceremony and reception.
Date: May 4th, 2019
Guest Count: 81 invited, 58 RSVP'd Yes, 57 attended (one person couldn't make it as his SO ended up in the hospital). I did an in-depth RSVP breakdown in another post HERE, if you want to take a peek.
General Timeline/Vibe: Morning set-up, get ready, first look & all posed photos 3-4:30pm, 5pm ceremony, 30 min cocktail hour, sit down plated dinner, dancing. Very easy going, I wanted to make it a priority to enjoy my own wedding, spend time with guests, eat and drink.
 
PICTURES FIRST OF COURSE!!
 
Budget Notes:

• We had initially begun the wedding planning with a goal of keeping it under $10k CAD - we live in a very HCOL area, and with student loans and other debt, we wanted to keep it as low as possible. As we got deep into planning, and discovered things we didn't want to compromise on, the final budget came out to somewhere around the $14k CAD range.
  
• We are extremely lucky that my parents are very well off, and offered to pay for a large majority of the wedding. We honestly couldn't have had the wedding we did without their support.
  
• I made it a point to research as much as possible to make sure we were getting the best vendors we could within our budget (vision, aesthetic, personality).
  
• All of the prices reflected below are in Canadian dollars
  

 
Final Total: $15,711.09 (~$11.8k USD)
  Venue: $560.00

• Rental Fee: $500
  
  • We had less than their ideal amount of 75 guests, so they did charge us a room fee. Had we bumped the guest list, the venue would have been FREE.
• Ivory napkins: $60
  
  • They provided black napkins for free, but I was willing to shell out the $60 for ivory napkins to better match the decor and aestheic.

  Food & Beverage: $5,918.47

• Food: $2,622.41 (incl. tax & gratuity)
  
  • 4-course meal which included Bruschetta, Antipasto, Salad & Main (Chicken, Salmon or Vegetarian).
  • The food was ABSOLUTELY AMAZING. This was one of the places I was not willing to compromise too much. I was adamant I did not want a buffet or family style and I wanted something different than the usual "chicken, pasta & vegetables" that shows up at most banquet hall weddings. This is the reason we went with a restaurant and not a hall.
  • I ate to much and could barely breathe in my dress lol
• Bar: $2,978.71 (incl. tax & gratuity)
  
  • Full open bar with a prosecco toast before dinner (with my parents' speech)
  • This ended up being more than I had budgeted, but everyone had a great time.
• Dessert: $317.35 (incl. tax)
  
  • We ended up choosing Riverside Pie Cafe to do our dessert table and we don't regret it one bit
  • They baked everything fresh the morning of the wedding and delivered it to the venue for free
  • We ended up ordering 126 servings of pie (made up of 1 full size apple pie for cutting, a variety of tarts - pecan, apple, lemon and strawberry-rhubarb, as well as raspberry danishes and walnut brownies)
  • Almost everything was eaten, and I literally had one bit of the pie we cut, and one bit of lemon tart - I regret eating so much at dinner because I was too full to enjoy the dessert!

  Attire: $2,216.50

• Dress & Alterations: $1,422.10
  
  • My dress was Mori Lee by Madeline Gardiner style 5276 ($1,322.10) and I felt like an absolute princess.
  • Alterations were done by a nice older lady who came recommended by my mom's friend & boss. She only charged me $100 for hemming the EIGHT layers of my dress, taking in the bust, and added a simple loop bustle. I was shocked when she only asked for $100.
• Bride's Accessories: $151.45
  
  • I got a simple single layer cathedral veil from Amazon ($14.62) and it was perfect.
  • My jewellery was from Jon Richard Jewellery ($72.61) - my parents happened to be in the UK and I asked them to pick up a hair comb and earrings while they were there as this is a British company.
  • I chose to go with flats for my wedding shoes as I knew I would be uncomfortable in heels and would likely take them off sooner than later anyways. I didn't want to hem my dress to heel height and then be tripping over the dress when I took them off, so I chose to stick with flats and hemmed the dress to my height (5' 4"). I went with rose gold t-strap flats from Mod Cloth ($64.22)
• Groom's Attire: $642.95
  
  • My Husband could not decide on a suit for the longest time. He initially wanted blue, then dark green, then burgundy.. He also thought about getting something custom made, but ultimately decided it wasn't worth the cost as he only wears a suit maybe once a year. He found it difficult to find anything he liked in a colour that he liked for months on end - but finally decided on a blue tuxedo from Simon's ($367.25) which included free hemming of his pants.
  • Shoes from Steve Madden ($135.60)
  • Shirt from Moore's, Bowtie & Suspenders from Le Chateau, Cufflinks from Simon's ($140.10)

  Rings: $762.15

• Bride's: $454.25
  
  • 14k rose gold & diamond band
• Groom's: $454.25
  
  • 10k rose gold 5mm comfort fit band
• This is one of the places where we regret the vendor. We went with an independent, local jeweller and we had a fantastic inital purchase. But the customer service in the following visits and months was appalling. We purchased warranties with each ring but really don't feel comfortable using them again and trusting the store with our rings - super unfortunate and a waste of money for the warranty.
  

  Hair & Makeup: $215.00

• I used this makeup artist for my engagement shoot, and rehired her for the wedding.
• She recommended a hair stylist and I went forward to book her as well.
• They both came to my parent's house on the day of the wedding with assistants, and took amazing care of everyone getting their hair and makeup done.
• I didn't require anyone to have either done, and everyone paid their own share

  Photographer: $2,150.00

• 6 hours shooting time, 2 photographers, engagement shoot, USB with all edited photos and a glass presentation box with a few prints
• One of our favourite vendors throughout this whole process - she was our age and we just vibed with her so well
• We got 15 sneak peek pictures within a week of the wedding and the full gallery of 656 photos a month later!
• If anyone is in that area I HIGHLY recommend her: Jessica Ruxton Photography

  Invitations & Paper: $297.53

• We are huge supporters of Vistaprint and have been using them for years without issue. This time was no different and we are extremely happy with the results.
• I waited for a good discount day and was able to get 50% off of our invitation suites (invite, rsvp & detail cards, envelope seals) for $96.00 (50 sets)
• Even though I love Vistaprint, I am not in love with the thickness of their envelopes, so I ordered cream A7 envelopes and pink A2 envelopes from Paper Garden ($58.75) - worth the upgrade for wedding invites in my opinion
• Vellum for belly bands: $12.31
• In addition to invites, we also ordered menus (60) and little thank you cards (100) for each setting from Vistaprint ($56.57) with a 30% off coupon
• Postage ended up costing us $73.90

  Florals: $1,184.24

• I was initially going to do all the flowers myself using a combination of Costco and bulk online florists, but over the months of planning I decided it would be too stressful for me and too much work (I have ZERO experience flower arranging) in the few days before the wedding
• This is a case of "ask your dream vendor for a quote, even if their website says wedding start at double your budget". I had stalked this florist for YEARS before I even got engaged, and thought she would be out of my budget
  • I reached out to her (and a few other florists) and was surprised at the price she was quoting me - she was actually the lowest quote I got back - huzzah! She was an absolute gem to work with - even after having a baby only a month before my wedding! Stefanie at Bourbon Rose Floral Design
• I went with super simple greenery runners, white florals for the bouquets and some accent greenery throughout the space
• All in all, here's how the cost broke down:
  • Bride's bouquet: $175.00
  • Bridesmaid's bouquet: $85.00
  • Corsages (2) and boutonnieres (2): $120.00
  • Reception decor (ceremony arch, welcome/dessert table greenery): $138.00
  • Guest table greenery runners (8): $480.00
  • Delivery & Tax: $186.24

  Officiant & License: $515.00

• We reached out to a group of officiants and was put in contact with one who was available, had a Skype call with him as we live in the GTA, and went over the general timeline and how he works
• Along with his services, we also had access to a website that provided help in writing a ceremony with all potential elements (both religious and non). I worked through the website, choosing bits and pieces I liked in the months leading up to the wedding, and met up with him a few days prior to the wedding to go over it
• Officiant fee: $375.00
• Marriage License: $140.00

  Weekend Accommodations: $327.41

• I booked us a whole house AirBnb from the Friday night before the wedding until Monday morning (3 nights).
• It was a 10 minute walk from the venue and a perfect place for us to have a little time alone
• My husband also used this as his place to get ready on the day of the wedding and it ended up being great for photos

  Decorations & Misc: $1,031.38

• I tried to do most things DIY if I could, which is why this number is so large. But I also put things into my fuck it bucket a lot in this category lol
• This number is made of a bunch of things - especially because I didn't rent anything and made it if I could. I mentioned a few things that I am really proud of below:
  • Seating chart and table numbers I made out of acrylic from the hardware store
  • Placecards (and pie signs) were little acrylic hexagons I got from Amazon here
  • I was adamant I wanted rose gold or copper charger plates but I wasn't willing to rent them for $3-5 per plate, so I ended up buying white chargers from Dollar Tree for $1.25 each, and spray painting them with copper rose spray paint. This one was definitely a labour of love and I am really happy with the end result
  • I made the ceremony arch out of copper pipe from Home Depot, plus a set of curtains from IKEA
  • I spent a lot of time scouring Facebook Marketplace for things, and ended up getting about 1/2 of the candles and holders we used from there - this saved us a lot of money. The other half of the candles were bought at Yummi Candles or IKEA
  • Also from Facebook Marketplace, I bought a dark globe which we used as our guestbook - people signed with gold sharpies. I'm glad I have something we can display in our home!

  Favours & Gifts: $533.41

• Instead of favours, we just did a donation to the local humane society. We adopted our dog from there and as we couldn't have our puppy with us at the actual wedding, it was a nice way to think of him. We did manage to take pictures with him before the ceremony though, which we were so happy with!
• Everything else in this category is gifts for our parents, Maid of Honour, Best Woman, and two friends who helped us out immensely.
   
  

What Went Wrong:

• Almost nothing.
• I kind of regret not doing the "invisible handcuff" thing with my husband. I found we were separated for quite some time - either talking to people we hadn't seen in years, or getting air outside at different times..
• The music and dancing were not what I had envisioned.
  • I used Spotify on an iPad and the venue provided speaker system.
  • Spotify was great and we had a great time, but some guests kept changing the music by themselves and ruining the flow of songs that I had worked for MONTHS on, which to this day still kind of irks me.
  • Not as many people as I had expected got up to dance as much - but that didn't stop me lol

What Went Right:

• Almost everything. Really.
• Weather was great - it was raining a few days before, but was beautiful on the day and I was able to keep my plans for outdoor photos before the ceremony
• Food and drinks were fantastic. Ate too much Italian food.
• We had everyone there that we wanted aside from a few family members overseas.
• I married my best friend.

Now that I've literally written more than a lot of my college papers, hopefully this helps or inspires someone else in the journey of wedding planning. Yay!

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We don't have any photos back from our photographer yet but I have included a small selection of photos that our guests have taken. I set up a shared Google photos folder the next day, and sent the link around friends and family, it worked really well as within a couple of days there were 400 photos and videos in there so I would recommend something like that to tide you over until the actual photos come back!
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This Recap is long! So thank you for reading - I've also been updating the draft over a few days, so apologies for mistakes.

Background

Husband (55M) and I (37F) have been together 6 years, living together for 5. We had an 18 month engagement.
Married: 4th July 2019
Wedding: 6th July 2019
Guests: 60 invited, 55 attended. No kids were invited.
This is second time around for both of us, I was hugely anti-marriage after my divorce so my now husband joked I tricked him into it by changing my mind!! The proposal was in January 2018 and we started planning in around March and had the first vendors booked in April that year. Initially, the plan was to have a very small, very inexpensive wedding at our home but by the time we'd booked the first vendor I knew I would regret saying "If we do it at home it'll be so much cheaper, we can do it for about £3,500"! Husband has not let me forget that! So then we sat and did a proper budget.
Originally, we had planned to have the whole event at our house including the ceremony but it just wasn't going to be practical so we did it 2 days before in our town hall with my mum, step-dad and sister in attendance. It also meant our vows could be much more personal and intimate than we'd be comfortable with in front of all of the family, friends and our kids. I cried by the time my husband was through the first sentence of his vows, and then cried all the way through mine too!! It was perfect, and I'm so glad we did it away from everyone else. A couple of pictures from our Actual marriage

The Wedding

Budget: £10,000. Actual: <£10,500
We covered the costs ourselves and the budget wasn't really a set-in-stone thing, I put some figures together early on in the planning process and came to around £9,600 so rounded it up. When I went back through the spreadsheet this week to work out our final costs, we were at around £10,050. Assuming I've forgotten some things, I'd say we did it for within £10,500.

Budget Breakdown - Headlines

Venue: £1,415
We bought 2 marquees as none of the event hire places would rent to us... I guess when we told them some details they didn't think it worth their while? I honestly don't know as most of them didn't either bother to come look, and then those who promised quotations never followed through. One marquee was erected on our drive, as our ceremony space was in our garage! The other was in our garden at the side of the house, my husband built a timber floor inside that one for dancing.
Our house has 2 family bathroom/shower rooms, and we have our own en-suite. We made the upstairs bathroom for gents, and downstairs for ladies, it seemed to work well and there was rarely a queue to speak of. My friends all went together, anyway! And my sister showed a couple of my other friends into our en-suite for them to use when she saw them dancing outside the bathroom door! None of it was ever an issue. They did go through crazy amounts of TP though - 6 rolls in the ladies! So make sure you have twice as much as you think you might need!
We both work for a construction company so borrowed whatever we needed (within reason), which included the timber for the dancefloor, the carpet tiles we put down on it, the fence panels we put up around our garden to make it more private, the cable reels I used to make a little feature to put flowers on – we even had some large porcelain tiles that were left over from a job and we laid those on our garage floor!

• 2 marquees, £430 each
• 1 gazebo; £90 (didn’t last the whole day unfortunately!)
• I paid about £80 for tarps to fix to the fencing
• We bought a length of worktop for £40 to use as a bar and build shelves for the glasses from
• We also bought a huge second hand fridge freezer for £50 for ice and drink storage
• We hired 10 trestle tables for £50
• Chairs, and the covers, were free! We borrowed those from a community centre my step-dad is involved with. We just had to collect and drop-off, and wash the covers before returning
• Cutlery cost us around £120, it was not fancy but it was metal as I wanted something more robust than wood or plastic. I get 96 each of knives and forks, and 48 each of teaspoons and tablespoons
• We bought palm leaf plates too, 200 25cm, and 200 15cm they were really amazing and only £125 for all of them so I definitely recommend those if you’re going down the disposable/degradable route. We served gravy on them and they were absolutely solid.
• £145 for 42 300ml glasses, 42 250ml wine glasses and 60 champagne glasses. All bought from Ikea and they did a great job with only maybe 3-4 breakages all night.

​
Catering: £1,750
I knew I wanted to have great food but we didn’t want a dinner service or seating charts. As a guest, you hardly actually get to spend time with the bride and groom on the day so we felt that the important things for our friends and family would be good food, company and not having to pay for drinks! I think as we were at home and had few guests, the informal seating worked really well. The tables were close enough that conversations jumped from table to table and everyone seemed to switch seats to suit themselves, the day had a really nice party feel to it.
We went for a buffet that was part self-serve and part served, the catering company provided 3 staff for 3 hours within their price and enough food for 60 people. For £1,250 we got:

• Ratatouille pasta bake
• Roast chicken pie + gravy
• Vegetable quiche
• Sausage rolls made with local pork
• Potato salad with tarragon
• Pasta salad with spinach and pine nuts
• Courgette salad with grapes, walnut, butternut squash and herby dressing
• Quinoa, broccoli, roasted cauliflower, apple, beetroot and cous cous
• Lots of homemade bread (focaccia, garlic rolls, cheesy loaf)
• Roasted new potatoes with rosemary

In the evening, we got a hog roast, the pig was enough for 100 servings and it cost us £500, including the two guys who cut and served it all. This was served in a roll, and there was also an option for falafel, lots of mixed leaf salad, more potato salad, apple sauce and BBQ sauce.
We struck gold with the caterers; they were incredible. While they were around, they cleaned up, washed glasses, cleared tables and they prepped all the prosecco for directly after the ceremony. A lot of our guests made the point of how great the food was, with a few saying it was the best food they’d ever eaten at a wedding.
​
Dessert: £133
My sisters’ gift to us was our wedding cake, this was served right after we cut it at about 5:30pm. It was 3 tiers, one lemon drizzle, one vanilla sponge, and one chocolate. Every layer was so delicious – yes, I had a piece of each! We had a fresh flower topper, and semi-naked buttercream icing as my husband and my kids aren’t big fans of icing.
We also, at my husbands’ request, had a 3-tier cheese selection. This was £95 from Marks + Spencer, they do a whole range of celebration food that I had no idea about! The rest was for biscuits/crackers and some nice looking cheese knives.
​
Photographer: £1,050
This included our pre-wedding photoshoot, which was great because we got to know the lady who would be at our wedding and she got to know us. I didn’t want any ‘getting ready’ shots so she was scheduled to do the ceremony and then leave at around 8pm. She was great, and seemed to have a lot of fun! We went to 2 places to do our location shots after the ceremony, and we took a little longer than we had anticipated but not hugely, around 20 minutes. As she works on her own, as most of the photographers do where I live, we don’t get our photos for around 12 weeks, which feels so long to wait! We also get a hardback album for the price, too.
​
Music: £1,060
String quartet + sheet music for them to learn was £410 for 2 hrs – they learned Metallica, Nothing Else Matters for the processional and it was so, so brilliant and worth it. I literally only wanted them for that so it was a bit of a splurge! For the remaining time they were there, they played a whole range of music. This was during cocktail hour so we weren’t there and had gone for photos!
Our 4-piece band was £400 for 3 hrs – they were really, really good! I loved it! They played our first dance, which was Dreams by The Cranberries. They played so many songs, ranging from Bruno Mars, to Toto. It was definitely a party once they started and I think I danced basically all night!!
And finally, the DJ was £250 for 3 hrs – he was good too, lots of encouraging people to dance and getting the crowd going, I can’t remember what he played but I know I hurt the next morning!
​
Flowers: £202.50
This was for my bouquet, MoH bouquet, 6 button-holes, 1 6in cake topper. My colours were dusky pink, cream and blue. I honestly have no idea what the flowers were, other than some roses, but they looked beautiful. My mum grew some blue sweetpeas for including in the bouquets too, and our florist with really impressed with the colour and quality. I think that made my mums day!!
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Invitations and stamps: £100
All bought from Vistaprint, including matching envelopes. We didn’t send Save the Dates, and invitations were sent in two batches, the first to family who would be travelling was sent in October 2018 so they could arrange flights and accommodation, and the rest were sent in February 2019. My husband choose the invitation design, and I was really please with ho they turned out but I always knew this was an area I didn’t want to spend a lot of money on.
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Decoration: £900
This is an area I felt I really had to reign myself in – I knew what I wanted everything to look like in my mind but it would’ve cost a couple of thousand to make it happen and I knew that no-one would notice it wasn’t there except me! Everything we bought I would buy again:

• Hessian chair sashes, I also wrapped spare ones of these around the plant pots; £35
• Hessian + lace table runners; £23
• 6 lots of string lights for decorating inside and outside of the dancing tent; £85
• Paper lanterns, I think we ended up with around 60 of these, we hung them in bunches in the ceremony tent, and down the centre of the dancing tent. They looked really good and I’m glad we did it. They were time consuming to hang but worth it £90
• 16 pairs of various sheenet curtains to dress our garage £83
• 2 sets of battery operate curtain lights for in the garage £30
• 12 hanging bud vases and flowers. These were a great buy, the fresh flowers for all of them were about £3, and the vases themselves were only £2.75 each
• 40 fleece blankets and a wood effect plant tub. I could not believe how popular these were! By the end of the night, so many people had blankets wrapped around them. They cost £1.50 each from Ikea, and the tub was £18
• Various plants and flowers, mostly to fill space and I thought make a pretty feature. This was a bit of a last-minute splurge. I got the idea for it the week before, and bought all the plants on the Wednesday before. We had lots of little flowering plants, some big bamboos, a bay tree, some small conifers etc. this cost about £150
• Hanging planters; £48
• Easel and frames to display the order of service, bar and food menus and photo guestbook information. The paper good I printed for free at work, and I bought all the templates on Etsy. This was all around £55
• Frames and fake flower panels for the backdrop screen; £55
• Various bedsheets to use as table clothes or to make the curtains appear denser: £40
• Backdrop stand; £28
• Then there were all the little bits to make all of that work, like the cables to string the lanterns from, the fixings for curtains and curtain poles, various hooks and fastening… That is a long list I’m sure!

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Drinks: £850
We decided we would provide all of the drinks for the day, and when we purchased it all and stacked it up, it didn’t look like enough. So, my husband went out and bought another litre of vodka and whiskey the day before. On the Sunday after the wedding, we had three untouched bottles of vodka left, as well as a full untouched bottle of whiskey, as well as 40-50 bottles and cans of beer and cider and several half bottles of spirits, 7 bottles of prosecco and 6 bottles of white wine! I can’t remember exactly what bought got now, something like 12 bottles of various spirts, 24 bottles of wine, 30 bottles of Prosecco, 120(140?) beers, 50 cans of cider and loads of soft drinks, tonic water, bottled water, orange juice.
In addition to all of that, two of our guests made 3 jugs of cocktails, at 5 litres each. Which were so alcoholic and so tasty! I only got to have one of them because we were whisked off for photos.
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Wedding rings + jewellery: £1,061
My ring, which is a 2mm wide platinum half eternity diamond band, cost £692. We went with that because it matches my engagement ring and was on sale! So lucky! My husband is a builder so will only wear hi ring when we go out – until the point he forgets to! His band was a plain gold one, around 6mm wide and cost £240. He also bought me a beautiful Swarovski earring and necklace set, as a wedding present, the crystals are blue tear drop shaped.
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Outfits: £1,885
My dress, including alterations, was £1,275. It was an ivory and blush Morilee Massima, it had a much longer train than I remembered but I decided against cutting it off because every time I tried it on after it came in my size, I really felt like a bride. I had very originally wanted the layers thinning out a bit and some of the sparkles taken off but once it came in, I couldn’t do it! I even went for a hoop! I loved it, especially when the seamstress needed to take 3 inches out of it. I also wore it all night, didn’t even want to take it off for a minute. I wore a pair of flat light blue shoes that I bought for less than £25 from Asos.
I gave my sister £100 towards her MoH dress, which cost her something like £120. She wore shoes she already had. She also got changed as soon as humanly possible as she is not a dressy person! I encouraged her to buy something she would wear, I didn't want to restrict her - beyond the colour, which just needed to be blue.
My husbands’ suit was from a local department store, and cost us £340 including his shoes, shirt and tie. We went shopping for it together because he’s not a clothes person at all so was worried he’d get it wrong. Honestly, even if he had somehow managed to get suit buying wrong, I’d have loved it because it would absolutely be 100% the kind of thing he’d do! In the end, he went for a slim fit suit with quite a low rise trouser. He’s not a thin guy but he drowns himself in clothes that are ‘comfort fit’ and always wears his trousers so low down (under his little tummy). I guided him towards something that was cut at that level and would fit nicely without it looking like his bum is flat and halfway down his legs…. It worked perfectly and he looked so handsome and smart.
We also bought shirts and ties for all of the men in the bridal party, and that came to about £125. We wanted them all to wear blue suits but not matching, and luckily 4 of the 5 of them had blue suits already. The 5th was my eldest son but he wanted a new suit anyway so was happy to get his own that he could wear again. This was part of the reason we wanted them to be different, if they were same – especially as 4 of them or brothers – they’d never wear them again!
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Hair + Make-up and other prep; £30
I had my usual hair appointments but spaced them to time in with the wedding a little better! So I had my root touch-up, toner and treatment done on Wednesday so it looked good for our marriage on Thursday. I won a competition so got my nails and wax done for nothing! My kids bought me vouchers for Christmas for the salon that did my hair and make-up for the day, which also covered the cost of the trials I had too. So the only thing I ended up paying for was my tan! My mum and sister paid for their own.
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Guestbook: £250
We did a photo guestbook and I 100% recommend it. It was a big hit and most of the pictures are amazing from it! I love the look of them, and we encouraged people to take two – one for us and one for them. This seemed to work really well. We bought a bound scrapbook with plain pages in off Amazon, I think it was around £30, and set that on a table with sticky pads, the camera and lots of spare film and Sharpies. Lots of people wrote us messages and left their pictures in the book. It is quite expensive but it was definitely worth it and I’d certainly do it again.

The Rest

Best Bits:

• The weather - even in July that is something that can horribly wrong in the UK!! We had dry weather long enough to set everything up and take everything down again, the end of June was cold and wet so I avoided even looking at the forecast. The sun shone all day and made it an absolutely perfect day.
• The food – I can’t say enough good things about the food! It was incredible!
• Venue - So many people complimented us on our set-up, the decoration, how well thought out it was and how well everything flowed – I was so, so happy about that because I was having major doubts about it on the Friday! Whenever people said how great it was, I said my husband made it all happen by getting it all built and doing so much to help realise my ideas. When people said to him how great it was, he told them it was all me and he just followed through with what I thought was the best thing to do!
• Our kids and my step-dad – They were unbelievable. I made them spreadsheets and gave them lists of jobs leading up to the wedding, and tasks on the day and they were all so good. They ran it all so well, like a team of DOC! I was so proud of them all and so touched that they cared so much about making it a stress-free and great day for my husband and I. We’re very lucky.
• Our friend being our ‘officiant’ – he was great! He’d been so nervous but he really set the tone for the day, he wasn’t overly sentimental but we’d had all of that on Thursday when we got married, we wanted it light-hearted on the Saturday and he absolutely nailed it.
• No-one asked me any questions!! Apart from if we wanted to keep the top tier if the cake...!!! I nearly died! Our kids are 17 - 26 - No way I'm going back to square one again now!! Wooooo!
• The whole day!! – We had the best time, I honestly couldn’t believe how wonderful it was, and how lucky we were to have it all turn out so well and be so supported by everyone who came.

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Not so Great Bits:

• The gazebo that the photo guestbook and back drop was housed in gave way under the pressure! One leg snapped but everyone came to save the day! My sister, our kids, 4 of our guests, all rallied round to sort it out. We had 4 directors of different construction industry companies stood cable tying a broom to the crippled leg. It was a great moment, even though initially I was pretty anxious about it!
• Missing cocktail hour to go for our location photos! Not a big issue, and I loved getting away from it all with my husband but I think if I was going to do anything differently, I’d have stayed for cocktail hour and gone later. Maybe while the band was playing and all the other important photo ops had been done. The lighting would probably have been more favourable at say, 7pm rather than 2pm, too.
• Making the lemon tier the smallest one – this was eaten in about 10 minutes flat! I could’ve eaten so much more of it.
• Not serving some kind of snacks during cocktail hour – we were a little late back from our photos and our guests were getting hungry, sat smelling all that delicious food but not being able to eat any! I did think a few weeks prior that we should get crisps or something at least but it never made it onto a list (lists are so important, I cannot stess this enough!) so I forgot all about doing it.

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And Finally....
Having it at home was incredibly hard and stressful, right up until it all started happening for real on Saturday morning. We are extremely fortunate to have such wonderful family to help, and a great boss who covered the cost of our house being painted inside and out and didn’t mind us borrowing so much, and that we’re so competent at DIY, and that I’m into crafting, and that we had a week off with 4 weeks to go, and 3 days off before the Big Day… It was still touch and go in that last week that we’d get it all done!
However – On the following Monday night, when we finally got to sit down together and relax without entertaining guests, we both wished we could do it all again.
Our caterer actually said it was one of the best organised events he'd catered for, everything was arranged and everyone knew what to do and he was able to decide how to use the space best for himself. It was very easy and stress free for him. That was a huge compliment, which I share with this community because I knew nothing about wedding planning before joining this sub, you all have so many great ides on how to plan, lists, spreadsheets, advice. It's been great, and I look forward to helping similarly naive and unprepared people on their own journey into married life.
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https://imgur.com/a/fRTRtRJ
I've found budgets and recaps interesting and useful, so here's mine! I'll try to keep it fairly short - if you have any questions, fire away.
We got married between Christmas and New Year in Kelham Hall, Newark, UK. We saved £2k by having the wedding on Thursday, instead of Friday or Saturday. We'd have saved a further £1k if we'd had a Monday-Wednesday, but the way Christmas fell that wasn't possible.
Our ceremony was at 4:30. We spent a long time writing our vows and choosing readings. We also had a ring warming, which was really well received. The ceremony lasted about 15 minutes and was heartfelt and beautiful. Our guestbook had a section for people to write their favourite part of the day and 90% of people said the ceremony - it was personal and bursting with love, with no unnecessary waffling.
After the ceremony we had mulled wine, mulled cider and sparkling wine, with mince pies and gingerbread men. We wanted the day to feel wintery and a little bit Christmassy, without feeling like a Christmas party.
We went through to the main reception room after an hour or so of mingling and chatting. The tables looked beautiful. We'd bought cheap vases, filled them with pine cones which we had collected ourselves and sprayed silver, and twigs which we'd cut from my Mum's garden and painted white. Christmas baubles hung off them and the tables were finished with sprinkles of white flower petals, small snowflakes and some tea lights in glass holders. We'd wound fairy lights around the pillars in the room to complete the winter-magic feel.
Dinner was a hog roast buffet, followed by wedding cake. We displayed the cake - decorated by my beautiful friend - on the way in and it was removed and cut while we ate our main course. Cake cutting is a weird tradition that we didn't really feel like doing.
After the speeches, which were amazing, we headed outside for fireworks. I am quite deaf, so the fireworks were extra loud and AMAZING!
Back in for the band and dancing. Our first dance was 'All I want for Christmas is you' and then it was party until midnight. A perfect day.
Guests - 62
BUDGET:
My outfit - dress £450 (ex-sample), veil £40 (eBay), hair decoration £12.99 (Amazon), £150 for alterations
Husband's outfit - jacket and trousers £150 (Marks & Spencer), everything else was already owned
Best man's tie and pocket square - £30 (Marks & Spencer)
Flower girl outfits - £115 (Monsoon), petals £32.94 (Amazon - used on tables too), baskets borrowed, ribbon was lying around the house, shoes/leggings etc. were either already owned or bought by their Mum as things they'll wear loads again
Venue/food/drink - £4202 which included venue hire, all food, all wine/beesoft drinks (guests paid for their own premium drinks, if they wanted them)
Band - £1588 (paid by family as a gift)
Fireworks - £1000+ (no idea how much +, was a gift from family)
Photographer - £400 - we saved by booking him when he was relatively new, not having any getting ready pictures (so he didn't start until 3:30) and refusing a fancy presentation box
Registrar / legal fees - £463
Invitations - £44.30 (Vistaprint) with £3 postage - we used a friend with their own business to frank most of them and only paid for the overseas one
Cake - around £10? We made them ourselves and a friend decorated them as a gift
Rings - £238 (Amazon) - mine was £124, his was £114 - both plain gold bands
Guestbook - £72.78 = £36, polaroid camera and some film (eBay), £10.80, book (Paperchase), £25.98, some more film (Amazon)
Decorations - £140.40 = £42.20, fairy lights (eBay), £2, top hat for cake topper (Amazon), £25.30, paints and card for centrepieces and seating plan (Hobbycraft), £15, baubles (Debenhams), £1.90, small baubles (local farm shop), £32, 8 vases (Dunelm), £22, tea lights and tea light holders (IKEA, obviously - where else do you get tea lights????)
Taxi home - £32.90
I'm sure I've left something off, and I feel like there's loads of stuff I haven't mentioned! Anyway, it was perfect. :)
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Background: He proposed while on vacation in Disneyland on September 30, 2017, shortly after our 3 year anniversary. We decided Summer 2019 was ideal but we wanted to enjoy being engaged and didn't start doing a more in-depth look into budget, date, etc until January 2018. A lot of people felt our engagement was going to be "too long" (21 months), but it was perfect. I never felt rushed to book/plan things, we got to enjoy our engagement and were able to save more than enough money.
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Budget: $16K
Actual: $19.5K
We initially had our budget at $15K and then increased it to $16K after looking into prices in our area. We still went over-budget, but not over our means. We could still afford the wedding we had and we wouldn't change anything. We actually started saving well before the engagement, as we both had discussed a wedding was in our cards, but we really buckled down on saving once we got engaged.
My parents gave us $5K and his parents gave us $2.5K. The rest of the money was up to us. My parents used their money towards my dress and the flowers, then sent me the rest to use towards the reception. His parents live in another province and had little involvement in planning, so they sent us the money to use as needed.
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Guest Count: 110 Invited, 96 RSVP'd Yes, 88 Attended (9 No-Show's, 1 last-minute RSVP change)
I did an in-depth RSVP breakdown here.
The no-show's were a bit disappointing. We were informed indirectly of 3 no-show's and directly of 1 no-show. Luckily, one of our RSVP's who originally said he could not attend, had asked the night before if he could still come and we told him to just take the extra escort card/meal we were aware of. If we had known about the other no-show's we probably could of filled some of their seats with friends who wanted to come but we originally didn't have room for.
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Theme: Classic/Simple
I wouldn't really say I had much of a theme. I mostly just tried to play off my color scheme, which was mainly lilac and white. I got a lot of my inspiration from Pinterest.
General Timeline:
9:00AM: Getting Ready
2:15PM: Groom & Groomsmen arrive at Venue
2:45PM: Bride & Bridesmaids arrive at Venue
3:00PM: First Look & Bridal Party Photos take place
4:30PM: Ceremony start time
5:00PM: Cocktails/Family Photos
5:45PM: Reception begins
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PHOTOS
Here are some photos and I will have some detail shots scattered throughout the breakdown!
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Venue: $1,535.78
Booked the venue on May 16, 2018.
We ended up choosing a venue slightly outside our city (it is on the edge of the city limit), as it was the "cheapest" golf course option nearby and I really wanted to do a golf course. I liked the appeal of everything all in one place. Our venue's package initially required a full cocktail hour, but I really wanted to do a first look and just have the reception right after the ceremony. The venue was more than willing to accommodate that for us!
The venue provided a personal event coordinator, free overnight parking for guests, all day access to a private room, overnight storage, 1 microphone, TVs for slideshow, napkins (with folds), tables, flatware, glassware, chairs and basic linens. They had 3 rooms to chose from for the reception, we chose the mid-point room with a 120 capacity and private patio access. They had an indoor or outdoor ceremony space, we chose outdoor but had the option to use the indoor space as a rain backup.
Our venue also provided a logistics meeting with our venue coordinator and the catering manager 3 months out. The venue coordinator and catering manager made planning incredibly easy and painless. In the meeting they essentially worked out all of the logistics of the wedding day with us. They prepared a day-of timeline and told us everything they needed from us and asked us for information regarding other vendors and the decor. They made sure our day ran smoothly.
The venue had a mandatory 1 hour rehearsal. When we booked them they initially said they would try and get it booked as close to the wedding day as possible but no guarantees would be made until 2 weeks prior. They ended up making it a priority to book us the Friday before so that we could also decorate after the rehearsal. We didn't even need to decorate much because the staff said it was a slow day and ended up doing most of our decor for us (we had dropped off decor in the morning) before we showed up for rehearsal!
Food: $6,095.24
We had to use the food & beverage services at the venue. We could do platted or buffet service. When pricing it out, platted ended up being cheaper so that is what we went with. We gave our guests 2 meal options, Beef or Chicken, and on request they would accommodate vegetarian, allergies, etc. It was a 3 course meal. The starter we chose was a Caesar salad. The main dish was either Prime Rib with Yorkshire pudding, garlic mashed potatoes and seasonal vegetables or Chicken supreme stuffed with sun-dried tomato, spinach and cream cheese, with roasted baby potatoes and seasonal vegetables. For dessert, we chose cheesecake with a strawberry compote and fresh cream. This was $55/PP. Kids (12 and under) got veggies and dip for a starter, chicken fingers & fries for their meal, and a ice cream sundae for dessert at $15/PP.
Lots of people told us they loved the food. DH said the potatoes could of been better but that he still really enjoyed the rest of his meal. I enjoyed my meal, it was very filling! MOH had to let my corset out a little after dinner... lol.
The only thing that I would change was that for some reason the staff had a long lull between serving dinner and dessert, so a lot of my guests thought dinner service was over and weren't aware there was dessert. They started getting antsy because we hadn't started speeches or doing dances or anything, because we were waiting for the dessert. I maybe should of had someone hunt down our coordinator to figure things out but people kept wanting to come chat with me and take photos.
For the late-night snack we had a build your own poutine bar, which was a massive hit for those who stuck around to try it! This was $12/PP and we ordered for half our expected guest count (50 people).
Bar: $1,206.80
Our venue gave us the choice of doing a cash bar (guests pay), subsidized bar (guests pay $2, remaining cost paid by host), or host bar (host pays entire tab or commonly referred to as an open bar). Bar prices at our venue were the price you would expect to pay at a local bar and our families are huge drinkers. We chose to do a cash bar, which isn't abnormal where we live. The venue also had an ATM on-site and allowed guests to start a tab with a credit card. We put all of this info on our website.
The cost comes from ourselves and our wedding party (and their dates). Instead of getting our wedding party a bunch of needless gifts, we got them each small personal gifts and chose to pay for their drinks as the rest of their gifts. We also paid for passed Prosecco for all guests for the toasts.
The bar made 2 signature drinks for us. I chose a Blue Lagoon (Vodka, Blue Curacao and Lemonade) and he chose a classic Mojito. I made a sign (with prices) and they were a huge hit.
We had 3 bartenders throughout the night, but it seems the first one was the only one who knew how to make our signature drinks unfortunately. She eventually came back and showed the 2nd bartender how to make the Blue Lagoon but he never got the Mojito right. So one thing I would be sure of, if you have signature drinks, is that all bar staff know how to make them.
Gratuity (Tip): $1,328
There was a 20% gratuity on the bar & food services. We forgot about this when we did our calculations. We both knew about it and it was clearly stated in all of our packages/contracts, we just forgot to calculate it into our budget, so this was a big reason we were over-budget. We had the money & it was no big deal, but just a cautionary tale for other couples.
Cake/Cupcakes: $368.80
Booked January 3, 2019.
We had dessert included in our dinner service but I really wanted to get a small cake for cutting and cupcakes from my favorite local bakery, so we splurged a bit here. We ordered a 6" cake to cut after dinner and 78 cupcakes that were put out an hour after dinner (to give people time to digest). We had a lot of leftover cupcakes, even though I insisted people take them home, nobody really took me up on my offer. If I could go back, I probably would of ordered more like 54 cupcakes instead. My parent's had a pot-luck on the Sunday after our wedding to attend and took all of the leftover cupcakes there, so it worked out okay!
DJ: $800
Booked July 9, 2018.
We are very neutral on our DJ. Our package included ceremony & reception music and equipment (speakers, standard lighting, one microphone).
We had some minor issues leading up to the wedding, but nothing I would consider a red flag. On the day of, all of the ceremony music was played right on queue and the sound was excellent. He struggled to find our reception grand entrance song and said he could only find a 30 second version. Our groomsmen found a 2 minute version and brought that to the DJ, but he tried to tell him it was only 5 seconds? It wasn't, he showed me the song and it was the same song I sent the DJ a week prior to the wedding when we went over the song choices. We ended up entering without music but he recovered it by playing the 30 second version before we sat down. He played our special dance songs right on queue as well and faded out my father-daughter dance song at the correct time.
When we went over songs prior to the wedding he asked for all of the songs above as well as 8 requested songs from the bride & groom and of course special instructions for "do not play" songs or anything else. For special instructions I specified that our crowd was into 80's rock and 90's pop and to play limited country music and choreographed dances. He played 4 of our 8 songs, and barely any of the genre's I suggested. People could also make requests, and I found out later that some people said they never heard the song they requested. It seemed he played about 50% of the songs people actually wanted to hear, therefore not as many people danced as I would of liked, which was a bit of a bummer.
I also found out after the wedding that he apparently was very unprofessional (loudly swearing) when he couldn't find our grand entrance song. He also supposedly was rude to my cousins at the end of the night, instead of politely telling them he could no longer take requests for the night, he apparently was short with them and just said "we are done after this song".
I wouldn't say he was awful. He was very prompt at answering emails/texts before the wedding, and he was very good at timing the scheduled music. I'm not sure if he was having an off day or what, but there definitely could of been some improvement.
Photographer: $2,000
Booked July 1, 2018.
Our package included one photographer, an engagement shoot, and full day coverage up to 14 hours. I loved our photographer. We vibed really well with her, she did an amazing job with our photos and turned them around quickly.
We got 83 edited engagement photos 1.5 weeks after the shoot and we got 425 edited wedding photos just over 3 weeks after the wedding. When I received the wedding photos, I noticed there was no full body shots of our first dance and asked her if she had any, she responded immediately saying she would find some and sent some that night!
Florist: $1,265.25
Booked February 7, 2019.
I really struggled to find a florist that didn't have a $2K minimum for weddings in my area. I was starting to feel defeated, when I started browsing Instagram, where I found my florist. They didn't have a minimum spend and worked with me to be closer within my budget. They were still slightly ($365) over-budget, but we decided that we could make it work.
We had 13 centerpieces (she let us provide our own lanterns for the centerpieces), Brides bouquet, 2 bridesmaids bouquets and 1 boutonniere made. She also provided us with the loose greenery for the head-table. The flowers turned out beautiful! My florist liked that I gave her creative freedom to just work within my color palette, and I am glad I did this because she absolutely nailed it.
Reception Decor: $545
Booked rentals February 4, 2019.
We rented 100 white chair covers, 12 white 120" round tablecloths, 14 lilac table runners and 2 white table skirts for $412.25. I wasn't a fan of the table cloths provided at the venue for the guest tables (we used their table cloths for all other tables though) and the chairs were those typical banquet chairs. We picked up the rentals Thursday morning, dropped them off at the venue on Friday morning, and returned everything on Monday morning. It worked out really well and I loved how it turned out.
The other costs were the lanterns for the centerpieces & frames for the table numbers and various signage, all from IKEA.
Officiant: $471.45
Booked July 10, 2018.
When we initially started looking at officiants, we were shocked at how much they actually cost in our area. We really wanted an officiant that reflected us as a couple, and didn't want the typical formal officiant. We ended up booking a company who has 4 officiants who all reflected an alternative style. They were super easy to work with and the officiant we worked with did an amazing job! I had tons of people tell us how much they liked our officiant and how well he fit in with our style.
Stationary: $250
We saved some money here due to the fact that I work in a print shop and my manager gave me free reign to print all of my stationary at work. We ordered our STD's off VistaPrint during a sale for $33, because I wanted to do the magnet thing. I designed and printed our invitation suite, all of our signage and thank you cards at no cost to us. Most of the cost was due to stamps, envelopes and the materials to hand-make all of the belly bands on our invitations.
Dress: $2,520
Purchased September 13, 2018.
My dress was Sophia Tolli Y11715LB Deon. I bought it off the rack, as the sample fit. I wanted something Elegant & Sexy, everyone told me I nailed that with this dress. It was over-budget but my mom & grandma agreed to help pay the difference so that I could afford it.
Bride's Alterations: $792.75
First Fitting: May 4th, 2019. Last Fitting: June 22, 2019.
Alterations included a hem, 3-point bustle, bringing in the cups to fit closer to my chest, extending the corset panel a bit and extending the boning to help smooth me out.
I only had a first fitting and last fitting. I was surprised they were able to do it all so quickly and efficiently, it really made me nervous that my final fitting was a week before the wedding but everything went well.
Bride's Accessories: $190
I went pretty minimal with my accessories. No veil for me, I didn't like the look of them on me. DH gifted me my earrings for Christmas and I saved them for the wedding day. I ordered Steve Madden purple block heels from ASOS. I ordered hair pins and a Captain America bouquet clip (keychain) on Etsy. For under the dress, my seamstress recommended high-waisted shapewear or nothing at all. I ordered cheap shapewear from Amazon and ended up just cutting a hole in it for bathroom breaks, and it worked great!
Hair & Makeup: $70
Booked MUA January 21, 2019. Trial was on May 25, 2019.
My aunt is my regular hair dresser and she offered to do hair for myself, my 2 bridesmaids (1 of the bridesmaids was her daughter, my cousin) and my mom, all for free of charge.
My aunt also paid for my MUA as a gift to me, I just had to find one. I found my MUA on Instagram. She charged $70 for a trial, which I paid for myself. It was $80 for the Bride's day-of makeup. I gave my bridesmaids & mom the option to pay for their makeup. My MOH & mom paid $75 each for makeup, my bridesmaid opted out and did her own makeup.
Groom's Attire: $400
My groom went shopping for his attire with my mom. I gave him a color palette and he got everything himself. He insisted on having a "proper" first look, so I didn't see his attire until the day-of. It was very cute and he looked fantastic!
Groom's Alterations: $100
My groom wanted to get his pants fitted a little better (he likes a skinny fit) and he had holes made in his shirt for cufflinks. He also got his suit cleaned/pressed.
Groom's Accessories: $120
He wanted to have some small Captain America aspects in his attire. He ordered his tie from Etsy. He got his cufflinks from EBGames (or Game Stop in the US). He got a 3-pack of socks from SockShop, a pair for himself and a pair each for his groomsmen. He got his shoes on sale at Call It Spring. His watch is one he already owned from a couple years ago and his ear plugs are the one's he wears daily.
Rings: $870
DH & I agreed this expense didn't really feel like a wedding expense, so we didn't include it in our total wedding budget, we had our own personal budgets for this. We skipped gifts because we felt like the rings were more like gifts anyways since we shopped for them as if they were. We asked for input from each other but we both did the research and picked each others rings.
He splurged on my ring so he could have it custom made with amethyst. He ordered from Sapheena on Etsy. I love my ring, it's beautiful and everything I ever wanted.
I ordered him a Tungsten ring with blue on the inside from EMBR. I also ordered him a silicone ring for work from Enso. He also loves his rings. He actually has been showing off his ring more than I have!
Miscellaneous: $790

• 2-Night Hotel Stay
• Marriage Licence
• Small personal gifts for wedding party
• Handkerchiefs for Mom & Grandma
• Cake topper
• UbeTransportation
• Crayons for kids

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We skipped a DOC, our venue coordinator filled the role perfectly fine, plus friends & family were more than willing to help. We also skipped a guest book and favors, nobody seemed to notice or miss them.
I did the majority of planning. I am very Type A and I have more down-time at work, as well as have every 2nd Friday off work, so it just made sense. All final decisions were made together as a team. DH did tasks when I asked and was a massive help with the DIY's we had.
We were very lucky in the fact that my parents hosted and paid for our Rehearsal Dinner, as well as put together and provided all of our day-of snacks while we got ready at the Hotel. My parents also built & paid for my card box and backdrop. Both of our parents also did all clean-up at the end of the night and my parents picked up all of our stuff from the venue on Sunday morning and returned our rentals for us on Monday. They were a huge help throughout the entire wedding planning process and we are very grateful.
My MOH & her husband also booked & paid for a hotel room next to us so that the groom & groomsmen could get ready in their room, while the girls got ready in our room. MOH's Husband also picked up the flowers & cake/cupcakes the day-of and delivered/set them up at the venue. They were also a massive help throughout wedding planning. Our day would not have gone so smoothly if it weren't for our friends & family, honestly.
This is already incredibly long, so if you have any more questions, don't hesitate to ask!

Hi everyone!
I got married on June 2nd and it was absolutely amazing. I found the wedding recaps and cost breakdowns to be very helpful, so I figured I'd share my own! I've included pictures, some are professional photos and some are from guests. I don't have all of our professional photos back yet but I want to write this out before I forget things!
About our wedding:
We got married on Ontario, Canada in a medium-sized town. Our venue had a max number of 140 people for dinner. We invited about 150 people to start, and then as people said no we invited the people on our B list (ended up being 170 invites in total). Our final number was 126 people. My DH comes from a very traditional Eastern European family (to them, we were having a small wedding) where big, fancy, serious weddings are the norm. My family is very much the opposite. We tried to find a balance, but ultimately we trended towards a fancier wedding as that was VERY important to my DH.
The budget:* Max Budget: ~$50K Final Cost: ~$35K
Our budget wasn't so much what we were planning to spend, but more the money we had available to us. We are fortunate to have parents who were able and willing to contribute to the cost of the wedding, and we had our own money saved up as well. We mostly went into this with the idea that we didn't want to spend recklessly, but we also didn't want to hold back either.
Dress: $3000 for dress, $400 for alterations This was way more than I wanted to spend on a dress, but my mom loved it and talked me into it. No regrets, my dress was absolutely beautiful! The brand is Sottero and Midgley, the dress is the Leona dress.
Accessories: ~$250 This one's a little harder to figure out an exact price. I bought my necklace and earrings for $150 from a store on Etsy, then I added a back drop to it. I also made the headpiece out of a hair comb I bought, some paper flowers I purchased from Michaels, and some loose pearls. I also made my own bracelet and bought stick-on nails. Probably spent about $40 on everything I made, maybe another $10 on the nails. My shoes were about $50 from Aldo.
Suit: $400 My husband purchased a suit through Moors, and he looked damn good.
Photography and Cake: $3500 We found one person who did both photography and cake, and we loved her. The cost covered two photographers for the whole day and a cake for 100 people.
Ceremony: $450 My husband is Catholic, so we got married in a Church. We donated $300 to the church and paid $150 for live guitar music.
Venue and Food: $8,400 We really lucked out with our venue. We ended up finding a mess hall at a local military college that looked great, was cheaper than any other venue we looked at, and was right on the water. We got the whole building to ourselves, which included a dining room, a sitting room, a bar, and a beautiful patio. It even had a pool table and a foosball table! These pictures really don't do it justice, most of them are from when we originally checked out the venue so it is undecorated and there is no greenery outside. It looked much better the day of! The food was absolutely incredible and the staff were all rock stars. The price included renting the venue from Friday at lunchtime to Sunday evening, all staff costs, passed appetizers, and dinner.
Open bar: $3600 This cost was actually much lower than we anticipated. We had a full open bar from 5:00pm-1:00am, wine served with dinner, and a scotch/brandy/port bar with dessert. Part of what kept the cost lower is we had an older crowd (most people were 30 and up)
Decor: $2200 I don't have a lot of good pictures of the decor yet, but this included table runners, chair covers, some draping in the dining room with lights behind it, draping around the bar to pretty it up a bit, tulle decorations on the gazebo, lights around the patio, and four fabric-covered cocktail tables. If anyone wants examples of these I can find pictures from similar events!
Hair and Makeup: $375 Included hair and makeup trial and day of service. This was done in a salon.
DJ: $1100 Included music/MCing from 5:00pm-2:00am
Limo: $1075 Covered a stretch SUV limo for about 5 hours to get the wedding party from their getting ready areas to the church, then to pictures, and then to the reception. We did not arrange transportation for the end of the night.
Flowers: $1200 Having real flowers at the church was extremely important to my MIL, and I wanted larger arrangements with hydrangeas to tie into our reception venue flowers. So we got 7 of these arrangements for that price. We left 5 at the church and took two with us to the reception venue to put near the entrance.
Gelato cart: $1100 This was a bit of a splurge, but it was worth every penny. We brought in a local gelato company we love, we got to pick 8 flavours (and do a tasting, which was the best).
Bridesmaids dresses: $1100 We decided to have the girls wear teal, but the issue with this is that a lot of the cheaper bridesmaid dresses didn't come in that colour. The dress I fell in love with was $340, so I gave each girl $200 towards the cost of their dresses and paid for the rush fee ($20/dress) to guarantee that we got the dresses in plenty of time for alterations. Lots of other pictures show the front but here's one that shows the back!
Bouquets: $150 I made crepe paper flowers and used silk leaves from Michaels for my bouquets. I made 6 bouquets for this price, 5 smaller ones and 1 larger one for me! The bouquets also became the centerpieces for the head table once the ceremony was over.
Centerpieces and floral decorations: $500 My MIL made the centerpieces, I went with her to pick all of the parts and she put them together. They even had lights inside! She also made some decorations for the sitting room and bar, she already had the vases so we only had to purchase the flowers (which she arranged) and the candles. There was 15 centerpieces and 22 of the candle holders.
Wedding rings: ~$2500 Our wedding rings were more on the expensive side. My husband wanted a more unique metal and ended up going with platinum which brought the cost up. We also decided to get two rings for me, but I only have one right now! He's going to give me the other one later so each on has their own significance.
Gifts for wedding party: ~$1000 We aimed to spend about $100 per person but I'm not sure what DH's final cost came out to. I paid for my girl's hair, bought them a blanket scarf in their favourite color and those socks that say "If you can read this, bring me wine," and wrote them a nice thank you card. DH bought the guys leather wallets with the groomsmen's initials embossed on and a titanium money clip.
Hotel rooms: $600 We ended up booking two adjoining rooms for two nights so that my girls and I would have a place to get ready. I stayed there by myself the night before, and then DH and I stayed there the night of the wedding.
Morning after breakfast: $1500 Our hotel did not offer breakfast, and we wanted a chance to see our guests again. We invited everyone to come but only informed them it was happening the day of the wedding. We planned for about half the guests to show up (~60 people) and I think that was fairly accurate. We went for a full hot breakfast with sausages, bacon, eggs, and then breads, coffee, juice, etc.
Other Miscellaneous costs:

• Invitations: I don't remember how much these cost, but I believe it was less than $100 because we got them during a Vistaprint 50% off sale. Stamps were a surprisingly large cost, I spent over $100 on those alone!
• Favours: I made crackers that had a small bag of wedding-themed hershey's kisses and a thank you note inside, these cost about $250 to make 132 of them. We also bought custom paper coasters that said "Cheers to love, laughter, and happily ever after" along with our names and wedding date, they were $70 for 300. These were placed around the venue so they weren't official coasters, but people were welcome to take them home.
• Guest book: We bought this print for people to sign in the largest size they had, came out to $85 CAD.
• I bought wooden table numbers and painted them in the colours I wanted, as well as votive holders that matched our centerpieces. I think I spent $15 on the table numbers and about $75 on 48 votive holders with battery-powered tea lights to go inside.
• DIY projects: I made all of my bridesmaid's jewelry (they all got the same bracelet as me), 26 pew decorations, the cake toppers, some signs I apparently didn't get a picture of but were just in picture frames, and the boutonnierres for DH, his groomsmen, our dads, and our brothers as well as similar corsages for our mothers (I purchased these paper flowers). All in all, I spent probably between $150-$100 on all of these, most things were purchased either from the dollar store or as cheaply as possible from Amazon.
• Not that this was a cost, but we didn't want to spend money on a videographer so we just borrowed a camera and tripod to record the ceremony and speeches because that's all we wanted.

What went right:

• I am not religious, so I was nervous about getting married in a church and being made to feel like I was doing something wrong. Thankfully, we found a Catholic Church that was laid back and easy going, and the priest was hilarious and always made me feel welcome. I think we lucked out!
• The weather was perfect. It was super hot all week before, rained the night before, was the best weather possible all day for the wedding, and then poured the entire day after. We really threaded the needle!
• I wanted part of the ceremony to be non-secular, so we did a short ring warming ceremony, with just our immediate family and our wedding party. I enjoyed being able to incorporate something that represented me into the ceremony!
• We got so many compliments on our venue. Everyone loved the fact that there were different areas to go to depending on what you wanted to do.
• We also got lots of compliments on the gelato bar and the scotch/brandy/port bar, the gelato especially was a huge hit!
• The cake was beautiful and delicious, and there were so many amazing and fun photos! So, so, so, so, so many!
• We had the best wedding parties ever, super easygoing and very helpful. Honestly, they made everything go so much smoother!
• The food was so amazing. We weren't able to do a tasting, so this was the one thing I was nervous about and they knocked it out of the park!
• We had people sing songs if they wanted to kiss, and it was great. Highly recommend it!
• If there was any drama, we never heard about it.
• I had the most amazing day. We were surrounded by so much love, and our day was pretty much everything we could have ever wanted it to be.

What went not so well:

• Our second photographer got sick, and we definitely wanted two photographers because we were getting ready in separate locations. The photographer's husband stepped in so it wasn't the end of the world, and he did fine, but he had to be directed by the main photographer and didn't work well on his own.
• The DJ was...okay. He wasn't horrible, but he wasn't that great either. He played quite a few songs that were hard to dance to and just really didn't fit the crowd. He had come highly recommended by our photographer and had lots of good reviews on multiple sites, so I don't know if he just had a bad day or what. Didn't ruin the day or anything, but dancing wasn't as fun as it could have been.
• One of my bridesmaids' dress was way too big for her. Thankfully the other girls pinned her in and no one even noticed.
• The biggest issue, our limo broke down! Thankfully it broke down right in front of where we wanted to take pictures, and they had a new limo to us by the time we were ready to move again. And it meant we got some funny pictures with a story behind them, like this one.
• I made a post about this, but some of of the buttons on my dress were constantly coming undone. It was more of an annoyance than anything, and by the end of the night I just said screw it and stopped fixing them.
• There was a miscommunication at the Church and they started the processional shortly after my girls and I arrived on site, even though some of the bridesmaids were still outside helping fix my buttons! Thankfully it only held up the processional slightly and everything got done up, but it was definitely a panicky moment.

Our takeaway lessons:

• We should have relied on our best man/maid of honour a little bit more, and on our wedding party in general. DH almost missed the gelato because he kept getting pulled away, and I only got some because one of the groomsmen grabbed some for me.
• The common advice of pretending you have invisible handcuffs wouldn't have worked for us, because we wanted to do different things/talk to different people. That being said, I do wish we had spent a little more time together at the reception! I was constantly losing my husband lol.
• We took the time during dinner to visit each table and say hi to everyone, and I'm so glad we did. It made sure that we spoke to every single person, and then it took the pressure off of the rest of the night.
• My mom recorded our first dance, and it's my favourite keepsake of the whole night. If you don't have a videographer, consider assigning someone to record it for you!
• We took a photo specifically for the thank you card and asked our photographer to make it one of the sneak peek photos. Made the thank you cards really easy!
• I had people staying with me starting from a week before the wedding, so everything had to be done by then. While I was super stressed leading up to this, once people started arriving I had so little left to do that I was able to just relax and enjoy myself. Try to get your stuff done early if you can!
• Try to take moments to take it all in. It goes by so quickly, so try to step back, take a few breaths, and really see what's happening around you.

All in all, this picture pretty much sums up how I felt about the day!
That's everything I can think of off of the top of my head, but if anyone has specific questions I'd be happy to answer them! It really was possibly the best day of my life so far!